


There's nothing I want more

by JustLittleMe



Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Children, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Grantaire has a child, He just wants to be a good step-parent, M/M, Stressed Enjolras
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-02
Updated: 2018-03-02
Packaged: 2019-03-25 23:30:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13845309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustLittleMe/pseuds/JustLittleMe
Summary: Grantaire is working late, so it's Enjolras' job to tell his step-daughter that he wants to officially adopt her. It doesn't go well.





	There's nothing I want more

It was getting late. Late enough for Enjolras to look away from the essay he was working with on his computer. The clock was a few minutes past five, and he knew that Josephine should’ve been home at least an hour and a half ago. He had asked her that morning if she wanted him to pick her up from school. He had a short day at work, for once, and he was more than eager to get to know his step-daughter better.

He furrowed his eyebrows as he saved his file and picked up his phone. No notifications, well, there was one from Grantaire telling him that the art gallery opening he was planning was going well, and that they were ready to start. But no word from Josephine.

Enjolras stood up from where he was sitting at the kitchen table, contemplating whether he should wait at home for her or go out looking. He was just about to fetch his jacket when he heard the door open, and the slam shut.

“Joe, is that you?” he asked and walked into the hallway.

“Yeah” came her soft voice in reply. Enjolras rounded the corner to see the messy haired twelve-year-old toe of her shoes. She had her beanie drawn into her eyes, much like her father used to do when he was younger, her scruffy sneakers squeaking against the floor as she put them away.

“Hey, how was school?” Enjolras asked, coming fully into the hallway. He put his hands in his back pockets, smiling softly at the young girl.

“It was fine” she replied.

“Okay… well, your dad texted me, said that the gallery opening was going great so far. He did tell you he’d be late home, right?” he asked. Josephine only nodded in reply.

“Great! Well, do you have any wishes for dinner? I’m not the greatest cook, but I’m far better than Bousset” Enjolras turned to walk back into the kitchen, hearing the soft shuffling of Josephine’s socks against the hallway carpet as she followed after him. She stopped in the doorway.

“I’m not hungry” she said, and Enjolras turned around.

“Are you sure? I can make something now and you could reheat it later. Or we could just wait until later? Maybe dad would like to join? It would be very late, but I’m sure he’d be excited that we waited for him to get home” he was rambling. He knew that. But he wanted desperately for Josephine to like him. He had been dating Grantaire for three years, and he had moved into the small family home six months ago. He had also been talking to his boyfriend about officially adopting Josephine, seeing as her mother hadn’t been in contact since Enjolras moved in, they’d thought it would be on the safe side if he was written up as a guardian, in case of emergency. They had yet to break it to Josephine.

“I ate a late lunch” she replied to his continued babbling.

“Oh… okay. Would you like some hot chocolate maybe? I could sneak in some extra marshmallows, as long as you don’t tell dad” Enjolras said. He had talked to Grantaire about this already, and they had decided, together, that Enjolras would break the news to Josephine himself. He just needed the right moment.

The mention of hot chocolate had perked the young girl up a little, and Enjolras grinned at the small nod he got in reply.

The kitchen was quiet as Enjolras efficiently made the hot chocolate, putting in four small marshmallows before handing Josephine her cup.

“So, did anything exciting happen at school today?” he asked, taking a careful sip from his cup.

“Well, my English teacher read my essay aloud for the class” she smiled. Enjolras lit up, English essays was something he could easily talk about.

“How great! What was it about?” he asked.

“An analysis of some Greek play” she replied, and Enjolras stopped asking. They sat in silence for a few minutes as they sipped their chocolate.

Enjolras took a deep breath and finished his cup. Taking one last minute to think through his words, he carefully put his cup down and looked at Josephine.

“So, your dad and I’ve been talking a little lately” he started, gaining her full attention.

“About what?” she asked hesitantly, putting her cup down into the table.

“Well, since your dad and I are getting very serious about our relationship, and seeing as I’ve moved in with you, we were thinking that I maybe could become your legal parent. We-” his next sentence was cut of by the screeching of the chair legs against the wooden floor, and Enjolras knew right away had he’d read the situation wrong.

“No” Josephine snapped, and Enjolras drew in a steadying breath. He’d been worried about this.

“Okay, what about it is that makes you uncomfortable?” he asked. There was little he wanted more than to be a father to this amazingly bright, young girl, but if she had any objections, he would back off.

“I don’t want you as a parent, because you aren’t one! Mom and dad are my parents, and I don’t need anyone else. We were doing fine before you came along and ruined everything! And now mom doesn’t talk to me anymore, just because you won’t go away” Josephine’s voice was raised, and Enjolras could hear the hitch of a sob hidden beneath her furious yelling. Regardless of knowing that she was wrong, her mother had taken off before he had entered the picture, her words hit him hard.

“Joe-” he was cut off again.

“Don’t call me that! Only people I like get to call me that! Only mom, and dad, and uncle Boss and uncle Joly, and Chetta and Ponine! Not you! I hate you!” just as the tears started to fill up in her eyes, Josephine turned on her heel and ran out of the room, up the stairs and slammed the door to her bedroom. And Enjolras was left alone in the kitchen.

He closed his eyes and took a calming breath, deciding to follow after her to try to talk to her.

It turned out to be a bad decision.

“Josephine… can I please come in?” he asked softly as he reached her door, making sure to knock before even touching the handle.

“NO! I WANT YOU TO GO AWAY! YOU’RE A STUPID DICKHEAD WHO TEARS APART FAMILIES AND YOU RUINED MY LIFE AND I HATE YOU!” Josephine’s voice was somewhere between hysterical sobbing and furious screaming, and Enjolras knew there was nothing he could do tonight.

“Yeah… you mentioned…” he muttered, backing away from the door as he felt his heart sink. He gulped audibly as he walked back to the kitchen, tears filling in his eyes as he rubbed his forehead to fend off the oncoming headache.

The rest of the night passed by in a blur. Enjolras tried to finish his essay, but found the words only floated across the page, and he gave up on wringing out the rhetoric’s for the night. He ended up cleaning the kitchen, doing, the frankly big pile of dishes, by hand, finding the repetitive movement calming for his racing mind.

Josephine’s words kept replaying in his mind, and once he looked past the original hurt from her harsh words, he knew that there was something else underneath. He also knew that she was right. He wasn’t a parent, he had no idea what to do in a situation like this. Enjolras knew that Grantaire would be able to calm his daughter down. Be able to talk to her. Make her feel safe enough to tell him about what actually bothered her. But, for all Enjolras knew, she could’ve already told him, he just refused to acknowledge the fact that she was right about him intruding on the family that had once been.

Enjolras eventually abandoned the dishes as well, sitting down in a kitchen chair, his head in his hands, fingers buried in messy, golden curls. He didn’t even notice how late it was until he heard the front door open. He was about to stand up and great his boyfriend when the tears finally welled up and over, and ran in salty streaks down his cheek, just in time for Grantaire to round the corner.

“Hey, you didn’t have to wait up, I told you I was-” he stopped before he got to finish. Enjolras quickly brushed away his tears and stood up, turning towards the drying dishes to start putting them away, hoping to hide his feelings for his boyfriend. He’d had a long and successful day. This problem could wait until morning. Grantaire, however, thought differently.

“Enj, babe, what happened?” he asked.

“Nothing… it’s- it’s nothing” Enjolras tried to sound nonchalant, but it was difficult to hide the tears as his voice broke. He cleared his throat and took a deep breath, closing his eyes, drying away the tears, and putting on a bright smile before he turned around.

“How was the gallery opening, anyone interested in your art?” he asked. He willed himself to keep his eyes dry, but there was nothing he could do to stop his shaking bottom lip.

“It went fine… Enjolras, what happened?” Grantaire wouldn’t let it go. He walked slowly across the floor and cupped Enjolras’ cheek in his hand, using his thumb to brush away a stray tear.

“I said it was nothing. We can deal with it at some other time” Enjolras brushed him off and turned back towards the dishes, putting away the last of the cups he and Josephine had used earlier.

“You mentioned, yes. And from the look on your face, it was a little more than nothing” Grantaire placed soft hands on Enjolras’ hips and turned him around slowly. Enjolras stepped into his embrace and rested his forehead against the taller mans shoulder. He took three deep breaths, steeling himself before he repeated todays scene to his boyfriend.

“I told Josephine about our plans for adoption today…” he started out. He made sure that he did not use the young girls nickname, she had expressed very clearly that she did not want him to.

“And I take it that it didn’t go well?” Grantaire sighed. He put his arms around his now shaking boyfriend, letting his cheek rest on top of the golden curls that tickled his chin.

“Oh god, she hates med, R! She said that I ruined everything, and that I’m a bad parent and she’s right, cause I just froze up! I blanked out, I had no idea what to say to calm her down! This was a terrible idea” Enjolras was crying now. Grantaire felt his heart clench at the despair in his boyfriend’s voice.

“No, Enj, she doesn’t hate you! I promise. She loves you so much. Whatever brought this on has nothing to do with you, okay?” Grantaire let his had stroke Enjolras’ back, holding the smaller man tight in his arms as he let him calm down.

Grantaire steered them both into the living room and onto the couch. He moved Enjolras’ disregarded computer from the seat and pulled his still crying boyfriend into his lap.

“Whatever caused Josephine to lash out at you today has nothing to do with who you are as a person. She could have a bad day. She could’ve stepped in a puddle on her way home and ended up with wet socks. And don’t tell her I said this, but she might just be experiencing some teenage hormones. None of this is because of you being a bad person” Grantaire whispered, moving his hand to stroke Enjolras’ head, brushing lovingly through the golden curls. None of the adults seemed to notice the twelve-year-old girl standing in the middle of the stairs, her cheeks streaked with tears.

“But you agree that I am a bad parent? I should’ve handled it a million different ways, but I didn’t manage! I just froze up! I didn’t have a single word in my head” Enjolras managed to cry out. From her place on the stairs, Josephine’s hands flew to her mouth. She had never seen Enjolras cry before.

“You’re an amazing parent. You might not think so, but I don’t hold all the answers. Neither does Joe’s mom. No parent ever has and no parent ever will. But we’re all trying. And you’re doing amazingly. When we started dating, you accepted all of me, and you took to Joe like no one’s business. Sometimes, I think you’re even doing a better job than me, and she’s my daughter” Grantaire desperately wanted to say the right thing. He wanted to calm his boyfriend down. Then he wanted to run up to his daughter’s room and ask her about what had happen to bring this up.

“That’s the problem though, isn’t it? She’s your daughter, yours and Petra’s, not mine. She will never be mine, no matter how much I want it” Enjolras huffed out. He sat up a little, just enough to look Grantaire in the eyes.

“And what makes you think that?”

“She said so herself. I ruined her life and she hates me.” Grantaire’s next words were cut of by a sharp intake of breath, the stairs creaking, and the shuffling of socked feet against hardwood floor. Grantaire looked up just in time to see his daughters retreating back as she slammed her door shut.

Grantaire felt Enjolras flinch at the sound, and he sighed.

“You doing okay?” he whispered, placing a soft peck on Enjolras’ cheek.

“Yeah, um… yes… I’m fine, you should go after her” Enjolras pulled back, rubbing away the last of the tears that had escaped his eyes.

“I’ll be back down later, when she’s asleep” he promised, and he got a nod in return.

Grantaire stood up from the couch and followed his daughter up the stairs.

“Joe, sweetheart, can I come in please?” he knocked softly on the door. A low “mhm” came from the other side, and Grantaire slowly slid the door open. The room was dark, save for the little nightlight that Enjolras had given Josephine when she was eleven, after she had told him she was scared of the dark. It was shaped like the French flag, and Grantaire found it hilarious, and Josephine loved it immensely.

“Hey baby, wanna tell me what’s wrong?” he asked as he sat down on the edge of the bed. Josephine was lying with the face towards the wall, and Grantaire stroke his daughter’s back as she shook her head.

“Please? Enjolras and I are really worried” he whispered. That only pulled a small chocked back cry from his daughter.

“Hey, sweetheart, please talk to Papa.” He bent down and pulled Josephine out of her blanket-cocoon. “Wanna tell me why you’re so upset?”

“Momma won’t answer when I call her” Josephine replied as she settled into her father’s lap. Grantaire sighed. He knew that the separation between him and Petra had been hard on Josephine, who loved both her parents more than anything. He also knew that Petra disagreed with his relationship with Enjolras. He wasn’t sure whether it was because of his political views or because of the fact that he was a man, but she had been getting more and more distant as Grantaire, and Josephine, grew closer to Enjolras.

“I’ll talk to momma, okay? Maybe you could start spending more time at her place?” Grantaire suggested.

“But I like it better with you and Enj” Josephine muttered.

“How about we start out with every other week end then?” He got a soft nod in reply, and his face brightened. Only to fall again as a small sob escaped Josephine.

“Hey, hey, baby, what’s wrong. I’ll talk to momma for you, you don’t have to worry about that anymore” Grantaire pulled Josephine further onto his lap, letting her burry her face in his shoulder. She muttered something into his suit-jacket.

“I’m going to need you to not eat my shoulder when you speak, honey, I can’t understand you when you’ve got a mouth full of jacket” Grantaire pulled back a little, taking Josephine’s face into his hands. He used his thumbs to brush away the tears that ran down her face.

“Does Enj hate me?” her voice was low and thick with tears.

“No, nononono, sweetheart, he loves you so so much, and nothing you says will ever make him hate you. I promise” Grantaire hugged his daughter closer, rubbing her back slowly.

“But I was so mean to him! He cried, papa, I made Enj cry!” Josephine exclaimed, sitting up properly and leaning away from her father.

“Well, I know Enjolras very well, and I know that he loves you very, very much. And I think that maybe you should go and apologies to him before bed, he’ll be super happy and give you a big hug” Grantaire smiled softly at her.

“Really?”

“Really”

Josephine drew in a deep breath and stood up from the bed.

“I need to tell Enj that I love him” she declared, and Grantaire smiled.

“Yes, you go do that!” He followed Josephine as she ran out of her room and down the stairs. She stopped when she reached the bottom, taking in how Enjolras was sitting on the couch, his elbows on his knees and his hands buried in his hair as he tried to regulate his breathing. Grantaire could not help the mixed feelings he had. On one hand, it was amazing that his boyfriend loved his daughter this much, on the other, he hated seeing Enjolras so sad.

“Go on” he mouthed to Josephine as she looked up at him with uncertain eyes. She took one careful step forward, then she marched over to the sofa. Enjolras heard her approach and tried to discreetly dry his tears. He didn’t succeed.

“Enjolras” Josephine began, “I’m sorry about what I said earlier. I was angry at momma and I took it out on you. I didn’t mean any of it, and I don’t hate you, and I’m sorry for making you sad”

Enjolras looked up, and the hopeful look in his eyes almost brought tears to Grantaire’s eyes.

“It’s fine, Josephine, we all have bad days sometimes” Enjolras replied. Josephine’s back straightened as Enjolras used her full name, and Grantaire furrowed his brows in confusion. He thought she hated her full name.

“No! You have to call me Joe, cause all the people I love call me that, and I love you, Enj! You make my dad happy, and you make me happy, and you’re the bestest dad I could’ve ever gotten” Josephine exclaimed. Enjolras didn’t reply. He surged forward and pulled her into a tight hug.

“I love you too, Joe” he sniffled as she hugged him back. Grantaire smiled happily at his little family. He walked over to the couch and sat down next to his daughter and boyfriend.

“So, Enj is the bestest dad then, is he? What does that make me?” he asked jokingly, and Josephine’s attention snapped towards him.

“You’re the bestest papa, of course,” she replied, as if Grantaire was stupid for thinking something else, “but Enj does give me more marshmallows in my hot chocolate, so if there was a competition, you would be losing” she grinned.

“Oh, so Apollo makes a better hot chocolate than me, does he?”

“Nooo! Not better hot chocolate, more marshmallows!” Josephine protested, laughter finally breaking through the sadness that had hung over her since she got home from school.

“Lies and slander, I always follow papa’s marshmallows rules” Enjolras protested, looking from Josephine and over to his boyfriend.

“Mhm, sure you do” Grantaire grinned, and Enjolras couldn’t do anything but let out a relieved laughter as his world fell back into place.

“All this talk about hot chocolate has given me cravings. I’m going to make some” Grantaire said. He left the couch and went out into the kitchen, leaving Josephine and Enjolras in the living room. They were quiet for a moment, both wondering what do say now. Josephine was the first to break it.

“I was wondering…” she started.

“Yes?” Enjolras prompted her to continue.

“About what you wanted to talk about earlier, about the adoption papers… Does that mean momma won’t be my momma anymore?” she asked.

“Absolutely not, your momma will always be your momma, and these papers would mean nothing more than that I’m your father’s partner, and that if something happens to you and neither momma nor papa can be there, then they will call me. For example, if you hurt yourself at school and have to go to the hospital, and both momma and papa are busy, then I can come and make sure that they take good care of you” Enjolras assured her with a soft smile. He was happy that she was willing to listen, so that he could explain properly.

“Then… then I want you to do it. I want you to be my dad” Josephine smiled, and Enjolras grinned happily. He pulled her into another tight hug as tears of joy filled his eyes.

“There is nothing I want more than to have you as my daughter.”


End file.
